Greetings to the Father, holy angels and saints in Christ. We ended the last post with a discussion about God’s definition of beauty in a woman and learnt that Ruth was beautiful in God’s eye because of her honor of Boaz (she bowed and worshipped him) and because of her obedience. We learn this because when we compare scripture with scripture, we see how her life beautifully matches Peter’s description of holy women of God in 1 Pet 3.

Ruth was covered with the glory of the Lord and this was revealed as she stayed in God’s presence, prayed and worshipped. How do we know that she was covered with the glory of the Lord? It was evident to Boaz’s discerning eye. In Ruth 2: 12, he operates in the spirit of discernment of her relationship with God when he told her about her relationship with the Lord, “under whose wings thou art come to trust”.

The one who dwells in the presence of the Lord will be usually able to discern the spirit of another human since all things are revealed to the vision of the Lord. This is because Hebrews 4:13 explains that there is no creature:

“that is not manifest in his sight: but all things are naked and opened unto the eyes of him with whom we have to do”.

In other words, God sees and knows all. When we dwell in His presence, we become just like Him in this way – able to discern the thoughts and intents of the human heart to varying degrees. Look at the example of Jesus who discerned the condition of Phillip’s heart (Jn 1:47) and that of Peter and Paul who discerned the motives of others’ hearts (Acts 5: 1-11, 13:10).

The same spirit of discernment must be exercised in choosing a mate.

Based on Boaz and Ruth’s testimony, I will tell you one thing that I learnt in my own life and that is very important. It is your Boaz who will discern the depths to which you are in the Lord. The man who is not your husband will never see your depths in the Lord even if you wave a big red flag in front of him. In fact, he will not care and will not value that relationship with the Lord. He may even prefer the love and friendship of carnal Christians. Don’t marry that man. You will regret for the rest of your life. Your fulfillment as a woman will only come with the man who knows God the way that you know him.

This is a spiritual mystery and the same applies to men since Ruth swept Boaz away when she bowed and worshipped him.

So what is all the fuss about? Modern day Christians may not relate, but guess what? The church is to worship the Lord. Go back to the mystery or parallel in Eph 5 and remember that the woman to the man is as the church to Christ. If you cannot worship and respect the man you can see, how can you worship the God you cannot see?

The person who cannot worship does not know the Lord intimately and will experience shortcomings in any relationship. The person who does not worship does not value the person or even the relationship that is offered to them. Worship means to honor and obey and if women of God are wise and really love the Lord, they will find many creative ways to worship the man God has given them to.

That is why you must not get carried away by titles because a lot of people are only pretending. I speak from hard experience with believers that is not at all romantic in nature, mind you. The same goes to the man.

The Lord says I am to tell you now about validation, although I had planned to do so later. There is the Law of Validation which is chiefly in the power of the man. See how Christ validates the church to principalities, powers etc, putting all things under her feet? We previously spoke of this in another manner.

Boaz validated Ruth when he:

  • prophesied to her
  • put her at his right hand at dinner
  • instructed the young men not to harass her and
  • also told them to let extra grain fall to the ground for her.

See how the people responded? They multiplied double what he had publicly done by giving double prophesies and blessings etc.

Men, you must treat your wife as if she were a queen (in fact she is). She is God’s treasure given to you in order to bring forth His purpose in the earth, just as Boaz would not have had Jesus without Ruth.

You cannot “bad talk” her with your friends, family or brethren. She will go down or become lower in their estimation. They will treat her badly as a favor to you.

If you “bad treat” her (Vincentian term), they will “bad treat” her.

Since she is your body, whatever you do to her, they will do to her, simply because you are the spiritual leader in the home.

There are many ways to validate your wife or fiancée. The examples I gave are just some superficial ones, but the Lord will reveal improvements to you if you earnestly examine your heart and ask Him to reveal its thoughts and intents towards your wife or fiancée and show you how to do better.

Women, the same guidelines are reciprocal,  but we are mainly to follow Ruth’s example in worship and obedience which are the highest expressions of love and intimacy as we learn from scripture.

Blessings and more to come (much more!).